I would kill myself

to feel that alive

You betrayed yourself, You betrayed us all

Your a fucking fake. I have never felt so much contempt towards anyones lifestyle and choices. I hope you fucking die. Kill yourself or just get the fuck out of my life. Your a fucking disgrace to the human race and I hate you. Get bent you whore.

Your love was a lie..

Right when I get ahead in life you pull me back down to where I started. Stop fucking with me, it hurts more and more each time. I warned you to stop and you just fucking wont. I don't know how people can be so heartless and love ruining people's self esteem. Get out of my life if you aren't going to stay in it for more then a week.

"All my life i've been dealing with the pain,
of trying to figure out all the rules to your game of love.
i can't break the emotional grasp that you have on my world,
how long will this last?
is it to have and to hold, or to abuse and control?
you can't make up your mind,
so why do i waste my time?
you broke my heart for the last time.
i trusted you, but now i can't confide,
because your love is a lie!
you keep walking in and out of my life,
manipulating me with your false promises and lies.
i won't let you play the victim this time,
cause now i know the truth and im' leaving you behind!
and for what it's worth, i wish it was you that was hurt.
you won't get my sympathy,
cause now you're nothing to me.
you broke my heart for the last time.
i trusted you, but now i can't confide,
because your love is a lie!"

Love is a Lie-Cut The Shit

a society characterized by human misery, as squalor, oppression, disease, and overcrowding.

My body still clings to life
Only my spirit has died inside.
(so I pray)
I pray for death every night
But I keep waking up alive
I cut myself for infliction
And I still spit at my reflection
I hate everything I am
I have my friends to think for that

So I keep taking my meds
And I do what my doctor says.
I hate myself more everyday.
I guess I'll always be this way

I've learned that love is dead
And that people just get fucked instead
And all the while making friends
Just to fuck them in the end

Everyone I touch infects me
Cancer in flesh there is death all around
Everyone I touch, I infect them
Black and dead is my heart

Alone, I'm not good when I'm alone
I pace and tear at my skin and my hair
Burn myself for some relief
For a sick fucking joke of a life
The punchline is when I die
And come back as me for eternity
Just to fuck up everyday?
And fail the ones that I love by being alive

I don't know who I am anymore
A parasite in human disguise?
Searching for a piece of shit with all of you maggots and flies

Everyday I feel that I just cant do anything right
I'm sorry if you know my name
I probably fuck your life, goodbye

Good for nothing

Thats my name and I am sticking to it. I have been fucked with countless times by people. Never as bad as this girl though. She just keeps breaking my heart every chance she gets. I never met anyone that gets so much pleasure out of hurting people. Though no matter what she does I will always take her back. She is my poison. She is the only thing that ever made me happy. I guess I put myself in this situation but I can't help but love her. I am a schmuck. I am hate. I am apathetic.

Ripped away

Fuck relationships. They always get fucked up all they are is a pain the ass. No one is ever serious about them it's just some stage in there life nobody cares about. Life is too short to rely on someone else. You don't need them, they don't need you. It's a waste of time. Fuck you.

This whole EMT thing

Seems to be working out. I am learning a lot, I think. If I can stck through this I may have a shot at living a happy life.




Maybe.